Why Being With Like-Minded People Is Dangerous
I was recently reminded of a dangerous trap that’s easy to fall into, and that trap is hanging around with like-minded people.
This came up when I joined a mastermind recently with other entrepreneurs. On our introductory call, one of the members said, “I am so glad to be with other like-minded people”.
Well, my brain just went, “WHAT?!”
I think she meant people with shared goals, which is great. But ‘like-minded’, do you know what it actually means? It means people that have similar opinions and interests to your own.
Learning And Growing Is The Name Of The Game
I’ve been around the block enough to know that it does not serve me well to hang around with people that are like-minded all the time.
In fact, it serves me well to hang out with people with great minds, with open minds – who have different views, opinions, interests, experiences to my own – because that is how I’m going to learn and grow. And learning and growing is the name of the game.
I’m going to give you five reasons why it’s dangerous, particularly for a leader and the organization, to hang around with like-minded people.
But first, I’d like to acknowledge that there are lots of positive things about hanging out with like-minded people.
- You get to be right more of the time, and we all like to be right. Our egos love being right.
- There is less conflict so you’re not having to manage difficult conversations, difficult people.
- It’s fun! You can riff off each other’s comments, talk in shorthand. It’s like my daughter and her friends who like film so much – they just chat away; it’s really fun.
- It’s safe and secure. You don’t have to worry that people are going to misunderstand what you’ve said because everybody is coming from the same place.
These are a recipe for choosing people to go on vacation with and people to have a fun dinner with. But when it comes to being a leader in an organization, like-mindedness is really dangerous. Here are five reasons why that’s the case.
5 Reasons Why Like-Mindedness Is Dangerous
1. Creativity
To really be creative, you need to have what they call ‘creative abrasion’. This is where people with different perspectives, interests and backgrounds are all rubbing to get to the better, more innovative, more creative ideas and actions.
2. Decision-making
We’ve all heard about ‘group-think’. When everybody has similar opinions, interests and backgrounds, we’re going to get group-think. Now, that will make it easier to make fast decisions, because everybody agrees, but are they going to be the right decisions?
3. Resilience
To have resilience, both for yourself and your organization, you need to be pressure-tested. It requires that there are people challenging each other’s ideas, and that won’t happen if you’re all like-minded.
4. Out of touch
It means that you’re more likely to be out of touch, as an individual and as an organization. You start all thinking alike. You become distant and removed, and that’s not a good thing when you’re a leader.
5. Stunts your growth
You might even become dull and, Heaven forbid, small-minded. You know what small-minded means? It means people who have a narrow outlook and rigid opinions. That can happen when you’re regularly grooving those same opinions and everybody is agreeing and reinforcing each other.
What A Great Leader Does
A great leader is someone who:
- Can take people from different interest groups, with different opinions, and have them see a common goal and then get them to collaborate toward achieving that common goal.
- Connects with all the people across the organization, not just the ones that they agree with, or who agree with them.
- Builds relationships with all stakeholders.
- Is secure enough to be open to being challenged on their ideas and even to be wrong some of the time.
- Is confident enough to get out of that like-minded comfort zone and into a zone where they’re going to be able to learn, grow and make a bigger difference.
So, when it comes to your career and your business, I want you to stop hanging out with just those like-minded people. Start giving yourself a chance to get out there, be a better leader and live a richer, more meaningful life.
I’d love to hear what you think, so scroll on down and leave a comment below.
Thought provoking post, May.
I like it. As human beings we all at some point like to take the path of least resistance, it just that easier. However as you said above, we have to get out of that comfort zone.
I must confess, I like my comfort zone, not always the safest, but I like it.
Thank you for posting this, made me sit up and take note, If I want to grow as a leader, I need to change my approach.
Glad you found this thought provoking, Hyran — and love the thought that you are considering getting out of your comfort zone! Sounds like in this case, change is good. Keep growing!
Hi May,
Your post today aligns with a class I’m taking: Intrapreneurship and Innovation. The focus is all about surrounding oneself with people who have a difference in expertise, culture, opinion, ideas and industry. The mix can be chaotic, but will calm itself and be effective in creating an environment of innovation. Without it, the organization can become stale and obsolete – who wants that?
Great points, Brenda. Thank you for sharing your experience. Being different and innovative trumps stale and obsolete every time!
As a seasoned and successful leader, I enjoy your messages-one of the few I consistently read and I think you make some valid points although I don’t completely agree with the polarity or simplification of the comparison that seems this particular email sets up. Nothing in life is that black or white-humans are dynamic and multidimensional- and it appears that like-mindedness is being depicted as narrow or necessarily limiting or even that diversity of thought somehow automatically means more valuable or evolved perspectives. In my view, neither is always accurate. I have a strong, deep faith that has guidelines for all aspects of living including modern leadership challenges and have a close network of like minded individuals who advise me on leadership challenges. Their counsel is based on a common faith in a specific God and resulting core values yet they are able to pull from and even challenge me with the experiences in their own life. My conversations with God through prayer coach me on the wisest counsel available to me and is deepened by perspectives of other believers not limited by it- because even people who submit to the same faith can offer unique and powerful perspectives i.e. “iron sharpens iron”. My key point is that this is a complex issue and equally, that wisdom doesn’t only come from people with diverse perspectives- it comes from within and above-from the spiritual dimension as well. When I realized this inward/upward dimension to leading I was no longer tossed “to and fro” from the ever-changing, fallible opinions of man and became a leader who offered vision and stability to those I influenced. Thank you for starting this conversation. Marisel
Many thanks for reading and commenting, Marisel. I appreciate it, and also your kind words.
Thank you for pointing out that there are multiple dimensions involved here, and the benefits from availing ourselves of all of them.
Most of all, thank you for continuing this conversation.
Hi I found this article interesting and helpful in most cases, bbut recently I discovered the myer Briggs quiz and I realized that my specific type is 1% and my temperament is only 6% in females so I was always around people that were extremely different from me and it crushed my confident and mental health. And I never yet met anyone with my specific personality in reall life!. there needs to be a balance and really this article applies mostly to only the 3,4 top most popular personalities which end up being around like minded people , but for all intuitive people they should look for more like minded people to help them grow in healthy way.
Thanks for sharing this, Rivi. I’m sorry to hear you’ve had this experience. As with most things in life, it is about getting the “mix” or “balance” right. And having a community of support is key. Wishing you well, and may you find the right community to help you grow in a healthy way.
Well said. I am quoting and reference you for my blog on DEI
I couldn’t agree more. I have been in leadership positions, and have kept this same philosophy as one of my tenets. I would also add having an open door to hear all ideas to that list. You touch on that but I found that including the lowest wage employee to the highest in rank on a solution is good practice as each will give you a needed perspective. My workplace leadership prides itself on being open but they are not. They have stacked the deck with all like minded people in all positions of leadership. They are making mistakes. These mistakes are based upon their “Mission” and their “Institutional Philosophy”. It seems to be a “catch22” as it is this same mission they point to as to why they have stacked the deck. They claim that they want leadership that all believes in the mission. How do you combat that?
This is a timely post I stumbled upon as I am in an organization that when you express a different idea you are deemed “difficult.” I like you pointed out common goal-being like minded in a common goal. My fear is that there are no checks and balances where integrity of the organization will suffer. When you serve the best interest of members, guided by your faith and strong responsibility to duty, to me that is my guiding light. You may not always be popular. I believe great leadership welcomes varied opinions and healthy conversations. Thank you May and to all for great insights.
Unfortunately for the most part I disagree with you. Basically in today’s atmosphere no one will listen and accept any kind of enlightening information. Been there done that. I have found that if like minded people assist each other to grow and learn they are more proficient at what they do.
A must read for the highly self opinionated whose skills & potentials are not challenged, less explored & limited within the circle of “yes members”.
I knew there was something fishy with like-minded people but you really cleared that one up May. Thanks a lot. And of course, you are absolutely right when it comes to the benefits and the dangers when hanging out with like-minded people. It saves a lot of time and energy avoiding sitting in the wrong room. I have had my share of teams and groups and networks where I felt like I was even falling behind (is down dumbing possible?). Staying too long in these groups will infect you with their mediocre habits. It took some searching and trying out before I could feel the energy of a group or team that really spoke to me and where I felt I could contribute to also. But lessons learned. Thanks.
That’s how you trivialized the concept of like-minded people. Nowadays, it is hard to find them at all. I got tired of having to listen to other people’s nonsense, and that’s how I broaden my “horizons”. Just because those people are different. Dissenters are also very tiring for the psyche when they drag you into their world which is no better than your own.. Cheers.